A little bit of my world in a blog......from makeup and fashion, through to interior design and all things vintage. A blog of thoughts, feelings and maybe a few ideas! -enjoy.x

Wednesday, 23 April 2014

Positive Thinking.....how to be happy and move on #2

Hi Loveys,
 
So this is a follow on the first post to help those think positively and to move on the best they can from a negative situation, this can help those with anxiety, low self and confidence.
 


 
 
How did the timeline and letter go? Be great to hear your thoughts and how you felt doing them. This next step is now looking at YOU, how you see yourself, what words spring to mind? I want you to draw around your hand and then think of 5 positives about you, about your personality and you as a person. This can take a little while but don't worry there is no pressure, take your time with this. With each word write it on the end of each finger on your hand.
 
Next, complete a positive box, this can be a shoebox or a Glossybox! Decorate this box however you like, it could be covered in your favourite photos, you could collage a variety of pictures you like or paint it, this is your box. Within this box I want you to put in all the things that make you happy including the hand activity above. You could put a photo in, a favourite flower, a favourite sweet or chocolate bar, a piece of paper with lyrics to your favourite music etc. This box will be something you use when you are feeling low, when you feel you need a pick me up, when these feelings occur I want you to get this box and spend some time looking through each item and reading the positive words about you.
 
These two activities are ones that you can do over time, if you want to take a photo of your box and hand activity then put it on Instagram or Twitter it would be great to see them!
 
Get ready for step 3 coming soon!
 
A xx
SHARE:

Monday, 14 April 2014

Positive thinking.....how to be happy and move on #1

Hi Loveys,
 
Here is a series I will start where I want to help readers move forward positively, whether its helping you with depression, low self esteem and confidence or a difficult breakup these tasks can help you move forward with a positive outlook. I do this within my work and have had successful outcomes.
 
Timeline
 
This is a the first task to look at, it looks right back in your past from the earliest memory either positive or negative, I want you to sit down and think right back to your childhood. At the top of the sheet of paper right "Born" then a line to the left if the first memory is negative or to the right if the first memory is positive and note briefly what the memories are then continue the line up or down. Continue this right up to now, include all significant things, bullying at school, changes or difficulties at home and relationships. When you have finished you can email them to me and I can give you feedback and advice on what I see, or have a look at it yourself and you will be able to see a pattern, our past moulds us to who we are today, we all have behaviours that stem from somewhere, it could be a difficult home life, a person at school who put us down or an abusive relationship. When we see what could have started these we can look at how to tackle these to move on positively. I am not someone who will cure anything or stop the pain, but I can give you tasks to complete to help you start a journey. Follow this series to help with this, also as I said email me on .
 
Look at your timeline and see whether there is a pattern, highlight the things that stand out as the most hurtful and things that are the most positive. Choose two negative events or people associated with these. With these two people write each a letter, DO NOT SEND IT TO THEM, write all your feelings that you wish you could express, these could be swear words, one simple sentence or an essay of emotions, let everything out on this task then get rid of it safely, some people rip it up, some people drown the paper in a bath and some burn it (safely). This is about the start of letting go of all the worries and emotions around these people and events.
 
Let me know how it goes and wait for task two.
 
A xx
 
 
Image from google.
 
                                               
SHARE:

Friday, 14 September 2012

Anxiety/depression...

Hello Beautiful readers...so todays post is more of a serious note. Anxiety and depression-a topic that many suffer from, most are silent, a topic that is seen as something in society that people "don't talk about". I have personally suffered from this and done a lot of work with people who have also suffered. In this post I want to reach out to those who do suffer, offer advice and support. I want to open peoples eyes to this subject so that they can also try and see what it is like for those who suffer or they may be able to help those who they think may be suffering. I am not a medical profession, just someone with experience.

Symptons.

Anxiety= a feeling of panic, uncontrollable fear, feeling sick, tension headache, unable to move, panic attack, palpitations, trouble breathing, loss of appetite, feeling faint, not wanting to see anyone or go anywhere. It can occur suddenly, daily or random times.

Depression.

Depression= a feeling of worthlessness, lost, unhappy most of the time, empty, unable to go out, hard to socialise, isolated, self harm, low self worth, unable to enjoy things, loss of appetite, difficulty getting out of bed in the morning, difficult to get dressed/washed. Can occur without person realising, sufferers can be unaware. Depression is long term if not treated. Is hereditary, and can reoccur again in future.

Dont feel like you are alone or that you are "strange" or "the only one" as many more are feeling the same way. Lots go through the same thing just maybe a different reason on why they feel the way they do. Its important you start to look up. It may feel like there is no way out and that you are in a black hole....but dont fear there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Recognise these symptons? If you have one or two is doesnt neccesarily mean you are a sufferer. Go to the doctor or talk to a friend if you suspect anything.

Some ways to help.

I personally am a believer that these things occur due to events happening in our lives. These events could've occured in our younger life without realising that these things can then effect us in the future. Negative voices stay with us if not recognised, if you dont face your demons or an event then you will find it hard to accept and move on. Some find a word, smell or by watching a soap with a particular storyline can trigger anxiety or the feelings within depression and not know why. Us humans sometimes go through "traumatic" events that we sometimes block from our mind. This is common and you may find that you know what causes these feelings but not the whole picture, unless you face this you may find these feelings will reoccur.

Timeline.

I have found this resource helpful for so many people. It focuses on a persons life, you look at every event that a negative or positive outcome starting from the earliest memory or event you know of, such as moving house or losing a loved one. You go through this timeline till your current status. If you look at someones timeline you can sometimes find a pattern, such as one person giving negative comments that you have remembered such as "you are so short" and "look at the state of you". Having these on a regular occurance can have a negative impact causing low self esteem. Why not give it a try and see what pattern you can see? if you cant and feel ok to then email it to me and i will have a look. I am 100% confidential so dont worry.


Letter to that person.

So following on from above, that negative person or a person who has created a negative event in your life. Write a letter to them, it can be pages long or just a word, write everything you wish you could say to them. This could be a letter of swear words, or a letter of what they did and how they made you feel. Dont send this to them, this is your private letter. When you are done read it back to yourself, then get rid of it. This could be burning it (safely!!! outside and dont be silly with this!), ripping it up and throwing it in the sea or merely a bin. However you feel is appropriate you do. This can give people a sense of closure, a sense of release.

Word drop.

Right thinking of that person or could be a place. Think of a word that you feel when you think of it. Write it on a tiny piece of paper. Screw this piece up as small as you can, and if you can see that person or place "drop" it in there house, bag or leave at a place associated with the negativity. This can also leave a sense of release. This may sound silly to some but honestly it can make you feel that little bit better, and they will never know. You will start to get some of the control they took away from you.

Positive box.

Right lets get creative!! Get a shoe box and make it a special box just for you to access. Decorate it how you would love, take your time on this as it is your special positive box. When you have done this add your favourite things, such as your favourite photo that makes you feel happy, a flower, scent, song, things that make you feel good. Then when you feel low this is the box you open and go through. As positive things happen take a picture, or write it down and put it in your box.

Letters from the important people.

Right another exciting little project. Pick one or two people that have had a positive impact on your life, that you respect and feel happy with. Ask these two people to write a positives and negatives list on you! Get them to put it in an envelope and give to you sealed. When you have them sit down with your favourite drink and open them! This is the best bit! The list will not be what you expected, the negatives are normally things such as "never does enough for her/himself". Read them and smile knowing you are beautiful and you are loved, place these in your positive box to read again and again!

Doctors.

You get some great doctors and some not so great ones, you literally need to "shop" around to find one you feel comfortable with and who you feel is listening and helping you. There are many paths to go down and its important you see your doctor and discuss how you feel. Take someone with you if it makes you feel that bit better. They may offer counselling that is very helpful, but its not for everyone and again you may need to "shop" around for one that makes you feel comfortable and helpful. The doctor will also look at medical support with medication, again this is something to consider. They will start you on a low dose with a particular brand, some solely help with anxiety and some for both anxiety and depression. Give it a go if you feel its right, but keep in mind that they dont help alone, well I personally dont think they do, have counselling alongside or support from friends/family. When you start you may feel like it wont help and thats because it takes 3-4 weeks for it to get into system and you may get side effects within this time which can fade. If you still dont feel right go back and they may either up the dose or change the type you are on. Be patient as this can take some time and when they get it right you will feel so much better.

Friends/family.

Some people will not guess what is wrong and some will not know what to do. But its important you talk to people about how you feel, what you are going through as if you suffer alone you may not get better, share a problem can halve it :). So take the plunge and talk to someone you trust.

Also, eat plenty of fruit and veg,with water and with alcohol try to moderat the amount you drink as this can sometimes heighten the low feelings.

Remember you are beautiful no matter what people say, you are a light that shines. Look deep within yourself and realise that you are stunning just the way you are.


Hope you have found this post helpful in some way, its just a little bit of advice that can help, or it may not. I hope I can help in some way. If you need any more advice or want to just talk then email me on . I am happy to help you, you are not alone.

A xx



SHARE:
Older Posts Home

Google+ Followers

Followers

Total Pageviews

Follow on Bloglovin
Part of the next blogger network

Archive

© Velvet Lashes | All rights reserved.
Blogger Template Created by pipdig