Velvet Lashes

I am my own worst enemy when it comes to feeding my soul, being happier and generally looking after my mental health, so I thought I would write a list of things that always spark some light and can then motivate me to ensure I make it a habit! 

One of the most important parts of my day, pre children, used to be my time to read! I would either buy or head to the library to gather up some books to get my mind wandering into pages of great literature, I found I would switch off from reality and my anxiety would reduce. Reading can relax the mind where it gets lost inside the words of a book rather then getting lost in worry and anxiety. 

Accept compliments, this is something I have struggled with over the years where I haven't got the greatest self esteem I find it hard to accept compliments but I started to consciously change this, instead of saying oh gosh no when someone would say something nice I now pause and thank them reiterating what they said in my head. This helps to accept what they have said and to store it away in a little lovely box inside our mind. We need to give ourselves more credit for being awesome.

Have a moment away from the fast pace lives we live. When I was little me and my family would go for walks every Sunday in beautiful places to feel free and have fun, these are some of my happiest moments. We recently moved home where our garden backs onto fields, I am so lucky and love the views! I try to make sure I take the children across the fields for a "bear hunt" like the ever so famous We're going on a bear hunt book, I want them to feel that sense of freedom, peace and fun exploring like I did as a child. Going on walks is a time I find myself feeling relief, where I can take a deep breath and walk off my worries. My favourite places are forests and beaches, they are the places I feel most at peace with myself, so when you feel like you can't escape your mind go for a long walk.

This is something I have always given to people I work with to help them recognise how they are good people, to recognise what makes them as awesome as they are. We aren't great at looking at us in a positive light, where we can stand in front of a mirror and with great confidence say why we are a great wife or a good friend.....so now let's do this! On a various pieces of paper draw a cloud in the centre of the paper with a heading on each piece of paper, one could be daughter, one could be friend, partner, colleague etc. Draw five lines out of each cloud and then write down a reason you are a good friend on each line....so a good listener? Loyal? And answer 5 positive reasons on each cloud. 

Laugh. Laughing is good for the soul, surround yourself with fun loving people who guarantee to make you laugh, or pop on that funny film. The film that guarantees to make me laugh is Stepbrothers, basically anything with Will Ferrell! Even when I am at my lowest and feel so deep in sadness I am guaranteed to at least crack a smile when fun lovely people or a funny film come on the screen. Laughing is also infectious! Spread the laughter and the fun.

Shop the look!

Just click on the links below.

Bag
Jeans
Earrings
Jumper
Shoes
Jacket- Primark 

Hope these were helpful, I'm now off to read my book!

What tips do you use? 

A xx

Its the soul that needs the surgery.....so true, words that set off so many alarms for many people. This society that we live in makes us strive for perfection, something that is unrealistic and sets us up to fail. We have it shoved in our faces on a regular basis, getting a toned stomach, bigger is better, white straight teeth, long thick flowing hair, tanned skin etc. Its all just too much and as most people there comes a point as a person where you feel like you cant handle it anymore, where no matter what you do, say to yourself or think you feel like you aren't good enough, you should be smaller, have straighter teeth, less wrinkles, all these statements go through my head and I feel like I am stuck. As Beyoncé says "Pretty Hurts" and it sure does, there is so much pressure on people today, constantly in music videos where women have a certain look, celebrities look as "perfect" as can be, magazines put pressure on trying different ways to "fix" the look you already have. BUT the way we all look is beautiful, we are all beautiful, we are unique and should be proud of who we are, of what we look like, how we stand proud to be us for us is perfect just the way we are.

 

Just felt like I had to put how I was feeling down in a post....

 

Thanks for listening

 

A xx

 

 

 

 

Hi Loveys!

 

So here is the third instalment to the positive thinking series. How did your hand activity go and have you made your positive box? Be great to know!

 

 

Todays activity is a focus on your week, sometimes we can forget the things that make us smile and focus on the negative things as they take over how we feel and looking around that can be hard. What I want you to is draw a timetable Monday-Monday, with two sections under each day, one representing morning and one representing the afternoon, then place this on your fridge or by your kettle basically in a place you go to daily so you can see this regularly. So I want you to write a positive on each morning and afternoon section of your week, so looking at the smaller things such as the sun was out which made me smile, I had a lovely cup of tea, I saw a great film, My child gave me a cuddle etc, so looking at the smaller things in life that make us smile on a daily basis.

 

This task is one that works really well, then at the end of your week you can look at how many positives occurred rather then the focus going on the negative. When you have completed this add it to your positives box.

 

 

 

Now I want you to start a positives jar, you can get any jar you like and think of something you would love to save for, it could be an item of clothing, a chocolate bar, getting your hair done or a beauty item you are lusting over write that on the jar. Now, everytime you get a compliment I want you to say thank you to the person without any hesitation, repeat the compliment in your head and praise yourself by putting £ in your jar, this can be £0.20 to £10 a go however much you want to put it, then at the end of a month see how much you have and spend it on something for you as a well done. Accepting compliments can be so difficult and people react in various ways when complimented, a classic is saying with a nervous laugh "Oh no not at all, I just threw this together" or "You should go to specsavers" instead of these type of reactions smile and say thank you then reward yourself because in the words of Loreal "You are worth it".

 

 

 

A xx

 

All images were taken from google.com